5 days

5 days. Five days until I move back to the city I have always loved, with no set date for when I will be leaving. When I left New York City after my internship last summer, I told anyone and everyone I would be moving back upon graduation – but in the span of a year, so much can change. I’d be lying if I said there weren't times when I felt like I wouldn’t be coming back, that my future had other plans for me. And yet, here I am. Baaaackk!!

 Shoutout to Alyssa Gill for taking great graduation photos for me! 

Shoutout to Alyssa Gill for taking great graduation photos for me! 

Being at home in Connecticut for the past month has given me an abundance of time to reflect, relax with my family, read, exercise, and most importantly, think about what’s next for me. While I’m excited to finally be free from homework and classes (FSU HESA can I get an “amen?!”), that sense of freedom is almost overwhelming. All this free time helped me to realize how stressed out I truly was at school, and how much I needed this break before starting the next chapter of my life. I have the tendency of packing my schedule/life to the point of exhaustion - where I’m color-coding my email and my iCal (with every shade of the rainbow). After feeling so relaxed the past few weeks, I’ve started becoming more critical of how beneficial that “busyness” really is.

Starting a new job and moving into a new apartment has already made the wheels in my mind start turning – what’s next? What ELSE will I get myself involved with once I move into the city full time? Politics? More non-profit work? Something artistic? Part of me just wants to pick up something and dive right in, while another piece of me is yanking me back and telling me to relax, even if it’s only for a New York minute.

My month at home has also given me the time to seriously think about what my life’s work is going to be. I’m not talking about “the 9-5” or “my career.” I’m talking about the rest of my life and what the impact I will have on future generations will look like. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the things I have done that have made me truly excited in my life – and I don’t have a clear answer, yet. I honestly don’t think I’ve had enough life experiences to know what my life’s work will be right now. But I do know that if there’s any place to gain new experiences and perspective, it’s in New York.

I love the breakneck pace of New York. I love how even sitting in a park or watching traffic feels inspiring. The feeling that you can be alone and not alone all at once. I’m excited for this summer, but also the fact that once summer is over, I’ll still be living there. Fall. Winter (ugh). Spring. The city that never stops buzzing.

I also can’t wait to eat all the pizza. And the bagels.

xo, Vanessa 

vbnyc